My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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