I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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