Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize
