I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
