I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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