Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
