I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Randomize
