just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
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