Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
