Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
