yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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