i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
