I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
wat bout pragnant strippers??
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize
