he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
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After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize