he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize