k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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