dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
