That's intense
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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