I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
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