Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
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You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
