Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
