The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize