I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
