i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
