He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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