Your dad touched me again.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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