Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
