scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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