great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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