As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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