Sry I called you an 8
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I think I just sharted jello shots
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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