i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
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we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
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Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Drunk is not a location!
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
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