Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
