thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
he puts the penis in happiness.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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