just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
