Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
