Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
