I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
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