Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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