Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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