yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
