I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I think your dad took our porno
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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