Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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