so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize