So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
