Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize