end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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