is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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