i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
