Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
