She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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