if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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