Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
