You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
ttyl tear gas
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
